You learn a lot about yourself and other people when you grow up. You learn what you like and what you don’t. You learn about what actually matters and who matters.
This is all very deep.
If only I could tell 15-year-old me – the huge geek who revised as if her life depended on it at school – that everything really was going to be okay.
When you’re a teenager, the tiniest things become the biggest problems in your life and it’s not until you grow up that you realise, none of that really matters.
So yeah – this is what I would tell little 15-year-old Amy:
1. Everything changes within a day
This is something someone told me recently and a quote that has massively stuck in my head. It applied last week when one really shit day ended up being great. It applied this week when I spent one day frantically trying to work out the bills for my flat and changing them all in my name and massively stressed out that nothing was working out, to the next day where it was all sorted and I spent the evening drinking wine with my housemate to celebrate.
Everything really does change in a day. You can have really crap days which are made even worse by you thinking they’re crap, and everything can just change so quickly and be better again.
I remember when I was younger getting so bogged down with the tiniest problems that seriously felt like they would drag on forever. And then the next day it would be better. And the day after that I would be completely fine – happy as Larry.
It’s a seriously good quote to live by.
2. Make time for the people who make time for you
This is pretty self explanatory but I guess when you’re younger you’re always put in that dilemma that you “have” to see that friend, and you “really should” go to this party and even that you “can’t not” invite another person because she’ll get annoyed and if she gets annoyed she’ll bitch to your other friend and it’ll just be too dramatic.
There’ll be a few people that you know you can count on. Ones that you know actually care, make the effort to speak to you, always know what’s going on in your life, know exactly what you’re like. They’re the people you should be making time for.
3. If you carry on working as hard as you are now, everything is going to be fine
In fact, everything will be more than fine. Everything will be pretty damn good. I used to stress so much in my geek-ridden days at school that I was just never doing enough. It carried on to college, and to uni, and even when I was applying for jobs.
I never felt that I was working hard enough, I always felt like I had to do more to get where I wanted to be. It might be that determination that got me here today, but I’d tell myself to just carry on as I was. Stop feeling that I had to do more – because it only made me feel worse about myself.
I’d say that as long as you have that drive in you – and it doesn’t disappear – then you’ll get where you want to me. So just chill OUT.
4. Stop caring so much what others think about you
I still do this now but I think it started when I was around 15 and thought I was really cool because I was in the later years at secondary school and doing my GCSEs and one of the oldest. Gross.
I got to the point where if someone who I didn’t know or like or care about did something that was negative towards me then it would REALLY get me down.
And now I’m like – who cares. Sure, it’s easier said than done – you can’t just flip a switch that turns off all your emotions, but I’m much more aware of this now. It changes a lot.
5. Stop buying shoes from Primark
I need to tell that overexcited 15-year-old teen that just because shoes are £4 DOES NOT MEAN THEY ARE GOOD.
They’re awful. Seriously.